“Because I love you.”
© 2015 Catherine Vaughan
A May to September kinda Love
All she wanted was that small-town kinda love. That simple love- love in it’s purest form. But she never got it. It wasn’t meant to be because she had bigger things to do in life. Her Dreams were there for the taking. They all came to her at once, during the summer where she had her last chance to get that love she should’ve had at 19 but didn’t. He didn’t hold tightly enough. The problem was he was a small-town boy and she was no small-town girl. She knew it was a choice between some guy who was no doubt a repeat of the one before only he looked like a young Jack Kerouac. He was irresistible. The Punk Hunk. All she has is a Stone Roses song to remember him by: “I wanna be adored.” He had that pull on her heart but he could not stimulate her mind not like the other one…
“How am I supposed to go on with my life knowing what we could of had?” -Buffy Summers
It was always the same story for her. A romantic beginning an intense courtship and a catastrophic ending…Those three guys looked different but it was the same commotion. A cruel conspiring of Cupid. She knew better….But she knew that this was the summer she could never forget because she’d always be haunted by him. The unfulfilled love, the dread of seeing him on the way to Andy’s he was so near to that place she called a Sanctuary. The Cathedral, the garden. This is it. That was it. Never mind that she saw his mother, his sister. It was meaningless. “What could have been?” Is the most haunting of all regrets. But they always repeat it.
Angel: “No one will know but me.”
Five years later and he sees her in a magazine. And he wishes he didn’t listen to her, when she whispered at lunch to stay away from the pretty girl on the next table. But you thought I was 15. How I wish I was. But I can’t be, not for him. Other things are destined like the next guy who will be jealous and possessive because let’s face it men don’t understand love they just desire after someone and are filled with the urge to conquer and take possession of…If he doesn’t have that in him there’s no point.
And she’ll marry five times. 4/5 husbands will be older and she’ll be even more unsatisfied. Husband No. 3 will be younger but nothing like him. Which him? She can’t remember a face just a feeling moreover a longing. Unfulfilled love is always so much more romantic…
Buffy: “Everything we did?”
Angel: “It never happened.”
Buffy: “It did! I know it did.”
Buffy: “Given enough time we should be able to- “
Oracle: “You alone will carry the memory of this day. Can you carry that burden?“
“I’ll never forger, I’ll never forget, I’ll never forget, I’ll never forget…”
“I will remember you.”
Partly inspired by my own longings and an episode of Angel TV show “I will remember you.” The most romantic piece of televised film. Buffy had her comfortable pure love with Riley Finn, I just got a guy that looked like him….But things have already changed #newfacesnewplaces.